The Truth...

it's time for me to believe what ppl keep asking me..
they asking me "ei, ur kenny got other girl outside izit?"
"ei, ur kenny fall on someone else d izit?
at first i really dun believe....
coz i knw kenny is not that kind of person for me...
but that is the FACT....
he fall on someone else and left me...
he giving me so many reason for dumping me...
the girl he falls with, i knw her...
she is meei qi...
a very beautiful girl...
a girl that is 1 of his buddy ex gf...
a girl working at hr payroll dept...
a girl with a sweet smile...
a very soft girl...
a caring girl...
a girl kenny's like...
a girl much more better than me...
he has been so mean...
why must he cheated on me...
why must he promised me he will loved me only...
izit im being too 'tian zhen' ma?
or being too stupid...
i duno what other will think about us...
will they laugh at me for being dumped by kenny...???
ppl keep asking me...
i duno how to answer...
i duno what reaction i should give to them...
i duno how to control my emotion when come across this....
it totally made my mood spoilt...
Should i hate him...
or wish him in happiness with meei qi??
seeing them 'xin fu' n im suffering here ma??
izit possible??
can i do it ma...?
"CELINE are you sure u can let go???"
"CELINE WAKE UP LE!!! you have nothing to do with him le....

Christmas Is Just Around The Corner

1 of the celebration i love the most...
romantic day...
last year christmas i celebrate @ genting with my best collegues n friends..
but most of them are not here anymore le...
thinking that this year x'mas i could celebrate with my love one...
but it's seem not come true again...
my dreams never come true...
my wish never 'shi xian' b4...
i wish for eternal love...
i wish for someone who can take care of me..
i wish for someone who could make me smile always...
a very simple wish...
i will make the same wish on this christmas again...
hope this time will never be the same again...
hoping that HE could hear my praise...
as my christmas gift...

The Day Without Love

a week past...
im not sure how's my feeling now...
sad or happy...
or im still trying to hide myself away from the reality...
im trying all the best not to think anymore...
not to care...
sometimes i can did it but sometimes i cant...
when nite comes... silent all sudden...
i will think back the memories we cerish 2gether b4..
how's da first time we knwing each other..
how he go after me...
what we had done 2gether...
where he brings me...
what had he told me...
what had he promise me...
sometimes i tot miracle will happen...
but it's not...
the past is already the past...
i couldnt turn back the time...
why did things turn out so bad...
sometimes i really duno how to overcome my feeling...
how to control my tears...
now... im walking all alone...continue my life without him by my side...
im all alone..
hope i will 'xi guan' lor...

I'll Never

I'll never loved again
the way i loved you
I'll never cared for anymone again
the way i cared for you
I'll never feel the way again
the way i felt for you
I'll never be attached again
the way i was attached to you
I'll never be devoted again
the way i was devoted you
I'll never tolerate anyone again
the way i tolerated you
I'll never concerned about anyone again
the way i was concerned about you
I'll never serve anyone again
the way i served you
I'll never laugh again
the way i laughed with you
I'll never cry again
the way i cried for you
I'll never smile to anyone again
the way i smiled to you
I'll never wait for anyone again
the way i waited for you
I'll never be sad again
the way i was with you
I'll never fall for anyone again
the way i fell for you
I'll never let anyone to hurt me again
the way you hurt me
I'll never be that happy again
coz... I am happier now without you...

A Story That Will Haunt My Life...

yesterday was my birthday..
suppose to be a memorable one...
but it become a worst history in my life...
a worst one...
a history he created im my life...
he has been so cruel to me...
he not only a taurus bull but a real bull...
why must he say it on my birthday???
all under his arrangement alr izit??
i have a very hard feeling..
im so down that day
i duno how to let him go...
im serious in this relationship...
for all this time he jz treat me like his sister...
how selfish is he...
he always say he dun mean to hurt me but he always do...
all the way he jz trying his best to love me..
not sincere... not from his heart...
he say giving us a week time to think whether we still need each other anot??
in his heart he dun need anymore even if i say i need him...
he dun need anymore... 1 week time is jz a liar...
he say dun wan me to be dissappointed..
but he alr dissappointed me....
on that day oni tell me he dunno wanna give what reaction to me...
n even how to face me???
it's mean it's not only my wrong all the way...
he might be done something wrong rite???...
fooling me around....
at first he say he go after me coz he love me...
next he say he cant get any feling towords me...
what the helll.... "yi shi yi yang"
keep on saying he is telling the truth wanna sincere to me...
the point is all the way he is telling lies to me... cheat me...
on my birthday oni wan to sincere with me...
on my birthday oni wanna honest to me...
on my birthday oni hurt me so deeply..
on my birthday oni say me i make him insecure??
i think he is the one who make me insecure...
he feel guilty?? coz he doing the wrong things, lies frm the beginning...
why he change all sudden???
izit become he fall for someone else ma???
c****? m*****? H** ***g? who?? who else he always meet??
dont let me know it... dont think i cant be a monster at the end of the day...
he change my life... he controled my life...
he scolded me i let him scold...
he want me to change to a gal he hope to have...
how about him??
why dun he look at himself first??
why dun he change too...
expecting me to change only ma???
until now im still asking myself shud i let him go??
set him free???
but how??? Time will proof to me...
i believe without him it's "not end of the day"...